Move to a rock and you’ll suddenly find yourself doing all sorts of things you would never have pictured yourself doing before. You squash cockroaches (the small ones, at least) with your bare hands; you pop a cold beer at 9:30 am and call it breakfast; you run out of water (something you once never fathomed could even happen) and learn how to prime what will be your first in a long line of pumps.

We here at Women Who Live on Rocks got to thinking about all of the funny, ridiculous, and often unbelievable roles we have all found ourselves performing, at one time or another, during our island life and decided to compile a list.

many hats

Here’s our collection of some of the island “hats” we rock-women wear, in no particular order…

Inadvertent Sand Collector

Loyal Kmart Shopper

Expert Identifier of Common Tourist Species

Displaced Goat Rescue Squad

Unpaid Tour Guide

Shrewd Scavenger Hunter of Grocery Stores

Indentured Hermit

Dangerously Under-qualified Amateur Mechanic

Mass Murderer of Mosquitoes


Billionaire’s Bestie

(Sun)Burn Victim’s Unit

Importing Logistics Expert

Machete Wielder

Complaint Department Desk Clerk

Island Legend Carrier-On-er

Jane of All Trades

English Language Dialect Translator (West Indian, American, and British)

Involuntary Camerawoman for Hire

Adept Waiting-in-Line-Time Multi-Tasker

Incomprehensible Directions Giver

Feral Animal Feeder

Rally Car Driver with a Masters in Reversing

Dater of Douchebags

Functioning Alcoholic

PADI Certified Babysitter

Reluctant Life Coach

Optimist Against All Odds

Mosquito Decoy –> Dengue Decoy

Unwitting Island Ambassador

Sadistic Exterminator of All Things Creepy-Crawly

Duct Tape Solutions Specialist

Compulsory Creative Cook

Fearless Protector of Reefs

Corrector of Published Island Inaccuracies

Online Shopper Extraordinaire

Ingenius Inventor of Parking Spaces

Lizard Whisperer

Defensive Paddleboarder

Professional Pump Primer

Self Bikini Waxer out of Pure Necessity

Defier of Logic

Ziplock Bag Evangelist

Indisposed Taxi Driver

Wayward Seagull Savior

island hat

Dilettante Detective

Beer Drinking Aficionado

Teeth-Sucking Trash Collector

Handy-Woman Under Extreme Duress

Stray Crab Herder

Conspiracy Theorist

Unofficial Observer of Eccentric Happenings

Hitchhiking Guru

Which hats have you donned in your island days?

Be sure to include any we missed in the comments below!

Written By:

Current Rock of Residence:

Virgin Gorda, BVI

Island Girl Since:


Originally Hails From:


Chrissann’s home rock in the British Virgin Islands feels bigger to her than it actually is. Though after spending five years on a teensy one acre island, the current 13-mile long rock she’s residing on now IS ginormous, at least by comparison. As with everything in the tropics, it’s all about perspective.

Once upon a time she used to care about things like matching her purse to her pumps but these days, any activities that require a bra and shoes go under careful, is-this-even-worth-it consideration. If island life has taught her anything at all, it’s that few things are more rewarding than time spent in the pool with a cocktail in hand.

As the Editor in Chief of this site, she spends her days working from home with her blue-eyed sidekick, Island Dog Diego, writing, editing, and cultivating content in the hopes of bringing some laughter and lightness to her fellow island souls. She recently published her first children’s book, When You’re a Baby Who Lives on a Rock, and is pretty pumped to share it with all of the island mamas out there. Her days off are typically spent boating, hiking, and meeting up with the neighborhood’s imperious roadside goats, who she shamelessly bribes into friendship. While normalcy was never listed as one of her special skills, Caribbean life may indeed be responsible for new levels of madness. She attributes at least a smidge of her insanity to the amount of time she spends talking to drunk people.

If you’re somehow still reading this and feel inclined to find out more about this “Chrissann” of which we speak, you can also take a gander at her eponymous website or follow her daily escapades on Instagram @womanonarock.

Want to read more posts by this writer? Click here.

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